“So then, putting away falsehood, let all of us speak the truth to our neighbors, for we are
members of one another.” (Ephesians 4:25)
Years ago, I interviewed for a position as the pastor of a small church. We liked each other, the fit felt good.
I advanced to the last meeting between myself and the search committee when they asked a question that
changed everything. Did I believe gay and lesbian people should be ordained as officers and ministers in the
church? I answered honestly. “Yes,” I said, “I believe they should.” My answer ended the interview and any
possibility of being called to serve as their pastor.
I’d wanted that job. And I suspected the search committee wouldn’t like my answer. In such situations it’s
tempting to “spin” what we say to get to a favorable outcome, or to avoid answering a tough question. But
honesty is the foundation of trust. If we can’t be honest, we can’t build trusting relationships — with others,
with ourselves or with our God.
Ephesians emphasizes honest talk and a “putting away (of) falsehood.” Truthful speech is the first step in
building any relationship, inspired by the way God is honest with us.
Examine: Recall a moment when you weren’t honest with someone. Breathe. Notice thoughts and feelings that arise.
Imagine: Imagine yourself talking to a friend and they ask casually, how are you today? How would you typically answer
this question? Pause to consider your thoughts and feelings so you can answer their question as honestly as possible.
Pray: Free me for love, O God, so I can live with heart